Falling Rays
by amyjpond
Summary: Set after the events, Christine needs time to think about her life. One with Raoul she presumes, but will her thoughts overlook the one Angel Of Music that never leaves her? Her decisions. AU.Oneshot


**A/N: So basically, this is another little oneshot that I have written to celebrate March Break. **

**- It is set after the events, and Christine is to choose her new life. One including Raoul one would think. And that is exactly what Christine is doing, thinking. Staying at a cottage in the French countryside, she is forced to remember and come with a decision on what she wants in her life, and maybe who she wants to spend it with..?-**

**Enjoy!**

**.heart.angel.93**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Phantom Of The Opera. If you excuse me…I have to wipe my tears…**

**Falling Rays**

I stared out the window blankly as the dark clouds continued their downpour. Hugging my sides, I rubbed them idly for warmth. Quickly, slipping one hand up, I wiped the splattered tears that cascaded down my hot cheeks. Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes, in hope that calming breaths would soothe my tortured soul.

"_Christine…christine…why…?" His voice boomed in my head, an angry yet wounded look of sudden insanity crossing his deformed features. _

My eyes flew open, widening in sudden panic, the memory slowly disappearing. Taking shuddering breaths I tried to calm my vivid mind. Glancing back out the dreary window, I let the splattering rain drops drip along the glass take my full concentration. Taking a deep breath, I slipped my eyes closed for a momment, easing back into a relaxed position. Opening them once again, of fear of the darkness that surrounded me, I began to sort through my distressed thoughts endlessly.

_He was mad…he was insane…he was….a genius..._

Sighing, I continued to watch the dirt road, puddles filling uncontrollably by the rain.

_..who loved me._

That one sentence sent shivers throughout my weary body, tingling down to my toes.

…_He was….beautifully talented…when his hands graced the keys…his voice…_

I felt myself begin to fall into almost a trance, remembering his hypnotic sound. The sound that one could be convinced as an angel….well…I _was_ convinced. A frown crossed my features unwillingly.

_**But**__ he deceived me. He betrayed me, my trust and all I stand for. Everything. He tore apart my heart.._

I felt more tears pricking at the corner of my eyes. Pulling my knees up onto the window seat, along with the heavy grey dress I frowned. I was never one for grey. Yet, it stood for its purpose, reflecting my emotions completely.

_Yet, he loved me. He loved you… Christine Daae._

Shaking my head slowly, I tried to rid thoughts of his love, his confession…his music, turning them to his…least qualities.

_He killed. He killed a men and Raoul if I hadn't stopped him. He was insane…a mon-…_

I felt a pang of guilt rush through me. I could never say he was a monster…No matter how much I tried…he would never…be a monster. No matter how much he acted like one…no matter what he had done to me. No matter his…face.

I should be able to say it, I should. After all that's happened. What he's done to me…. But I can't. I just can't.

_And then, there is Raoul. Caring, safe, loving, Raoul. _

I smiled a bit, recalling a fond memory. Leaning back onto the wall behind me, I began to twist a curl. The tears, I realized were coming less, now my thoughts on the fond memories…

_Then came Erik._

Why..? Why couldn't I have a good thought without Erik invading its privacy?

Erik. It felt odd to say. Did I really want to choose…No. I should clearly choose…

_Raoul…..or Erik..?_

Why couldn't I just say Raoul? Why couldn't I simply admit my love for him? Why?! Frustrated I let loose tears roll down my cheek. Why can't I…say it?

Feeling the time slip away from me, I knew that time was falling to pieces as the house darkened around me. The rain still carried on, a distant hum on the roof. I stayed there, my head resting on the wall, just staring endlessly out into the world beyond the glass.

Just remembering…deciding…wondering…crying..

I felt exhausted as I noticed the clouds starting to depart, revealing a warm sunset fanning out. In truth, I hadn't decided my true feelings, and the rays were proof of my turmoil. I had just sat there, emotionless for hours.

Gradually it dawned on me. It was over, the storm was clearing and the rays were creating rainbows on the water that drizzled down the glass in front of me. Reaching out to touch, I let my hand graze along its smooth surface, cool against touch.

Suddenly, I wanted to feel the sunlight again.

Emerging from the small cottage, I felt a cool breeze flitter at ribbons on my bodice, its gentleness brushing my brown curls. Feeling the sensational smells awaken my dull senses I obliged as I started to walk down the dirt road.

The sunset flowed around me, its rays pouring onto my face. I realized how much I had missed the world beyond the walls of the cottage, and soaked in the chilling warmth it gave me. Spreading my arms I felt a flitter in my heart as I grasped the rays in my outstretched hand. Tingling ran through my tense body, as the reds and yellows danced before my wet eyes.

Closing my eyes, I saw colour finally burst through the darkness, warm tones filling the corners of the once feared blackness that once immersed me. Light had been restored the darkness I had hidden away from for so long.

_Erik would have loved this._

**A/N: So, what do you think? I felt like being a hopeless romantic today...Thanks so much for reading! R&R **

**.heart.angel.**


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